::ChasingDaisy::

2003-09-15T22:59:00.000+01:00

I've moved!

Come on over and have a cup of tea and a natter...

2003-09-13T16:18:00.000+01:00

To the person searching this site for pictures of Fiona Bruce

There aren't any! Try using the "images tab" of any search engine with "Fiona Bruce". It'll be quicker, honest.

2003-09-07T11:28:00.000+01:00

We interrupt this programme to bring you the news that

service will be disrupted today due to tinkering in the archives.

Yep, I'm finally shifting over to TypePad permanently. Hopefully I'll get the posts moved today, comments tomorrow.

Is it because Bleugger was down for 24 hours? No. Let's face it, there are more important issues in the world than not being able to post for 24 hours. What has really annoyed me is the total, total lack of any communication from the folks at Blogger. It's been back up for about 12 hours now and is there any mention on the home page? Nope. Did anyone from Blogger think to post a message to one of the user groups? Nope.

I really don't want to move. I love the Blogger interface. It's like sitting in a comfy, squishy old armchair. Ok, the stuffing might be coming out in that spot at the back. And the dogs have chewed one of the arms and you haven't bothered to fix it yet. But it's home.

Moving to TypePad is like switching to a swish new chrome and leather designer chair. The dogs wouldn't dare chew this one. Oh get over it. I'll make it home, right? Of course right!

So why haven't I gone the MT road? I just don't have the time. I'd love to spend hours tinkering under the hood, getting help from you guys, learning all the while - but there are only so many hours in the day. I work long hours and frankly, I've come to realise that I'd rather be reading, linking and posting in those odd moments I get away. Even if I blocked out a weekend to get MT up and running, I suspect that it needs quite a bit of ongoing maintenance. So there we go.

Here's the plan ~ I'll spend a couple of days transferring things but I'll only post there. Could I ask you to hold off from changing your bookmarks/blogrolls just yet? - there might be a bit of domain mapping going on and I'd rather ask you to do it just the once. Diolch.

In the meantime we're off to meet up with my brother and family on their way back from a holiday in France. They will be very brown and very relaxed and I shall be desperately jealous but hey, they're bringing a stack of half price cigarettes so I'll get over it...

2003-09-05T23:17:00.000+01:00

Best laid plans...

Well no, I didn't actually have the day off today but I sure as shit ain't working this weekend so I'm still celebrating. I filched this picture from someone's blog this week and I can't remember where - if you recognise it could you let me know so that I can give credit? Cheers m'dears. It has brought much amusement to folks in the UK, Tokyo, Barcelona, Warsaw, Paris and Amsterdam. I'm starting to sound like a carrier bag.

Would you pay $450 for this? or this? I thought not. I would love to build a wooden bed for the dogs though. Kind of a low level bunk bed thingy. You see, Frodo likes to have his head under wooden things - he often lies with his head under the coffee table or lies completely under the dining table. Yet Dizzy likes to perch on top of the sofa. So instead of building a window seat in the bay window I reckoned we could make a large shelf with foam padding on top, and put Frodo's bed under the shelf. Does any of that make sense without a picture? I'll try and find the sketch and scan it in sometime over the weekend. I think we'd better make strong supports for the shelf, ensuring that it takes the weight of both dogs since they often curl up together in the same bed when they think no-one's looking.

And in other news. We looked after the granddaughters last weekend while their parents went to Belgium. Many thanks to Graeme for the link to homestar runner which proved even more popular than Barbie. But not as popular as a bedtime reading of One Snowy Night...

Quick links from an insomniac

2003-09-05T02:25:00.000+01:00

Quick links

I worry about what goes on my head sometimes. I just scored 9/10 on this quiz via mrtn at pink shirt yellow tie and to be honest it would have been 10/10 but I hit the wrong button on one question. Does this mean I know enough serial killers and programming language inventors to be able to spot the difference? Casts nervous glance behind shoulder... No I think it's because on the rare occasions I get a chance to "have a flick" (use the remote control in a desperate attempt to find something, anything interesting to watch among the 800 or so available channels on bogawful Sky, there always seems to be a documentary about a serial killer.

Anna's back with a lovely, funny tale of orgies and - well go go read it.

And primal purge (via Kate) has a link to a vile and disgusting story about cockroaches. Years ago I took over the lease of an appartment in the centre of Brussels (a spit away from the main EEC buildings made famous by many a BBC news report). The lease on my old apartment had ended but I needed to work another four weeks before moving to London so a colleague offered me the use of her studio at an exhorbitant rent while she stayed with her dripping-with-money ~~sugar daddy~~ new boyfriend. Miaow. But I digress. I moved in on the Sunday night, went to work on the Monday and um, well came home on the Monday night, tired and in need of a hot bath and bed. Bear with me, it's late and I should be in bed.

So I opened the front door and switched on the light. Something was not quite right. Wasn't the carpet beige or pink this morning? And then the carpet started moving. I'm sorry to distress you further, gentle reader, but you have to know that the "carpet" was in fact a sea of cockroaches disturbed in their - what do cockroaches do? - by the sudden light.

I'd like to say that I (wo)manfully dealt with the situation but instead I ran screaming from the room, spent the night at an ex-boyfriend's and made arrangements for all my belongings to be de-loused and removed. And now I'm going to go dream about bloody cockroaches. Dammit.

Yeeeeee-ha!

2003-09-04T23:53:00.000+01:00

Yeeeeee-ha!

Just finished up on the last but one project in the current cycle so I'm free-ish until Monday. It's a bit disconcerting to realise that I now have no excuse not to clean the house and empty the washing basket. But there should still be time for some fun. Like long walks with the dogs and catching up on blogging mates. Comment boxes here I come!

So apart from boring things like cleaning the house and catching up on washing and ironing, what will I do will all this free time? Well I could:

make a magic book.

check out a few new visitors such as Renee (although I think I'm about to be junked from her bookmarks *sob*); gang stories; webguerillas; Andrew at the idea shop (I should make a comment about the writing --good, especially the short fiction-- but check out the pictures, girls. If I were ~~five~~ fifteen years younger. And not mad about M. And not the other side of the atlantic. Bit of a non-starter really, eh?)

plan a holiday, maybe Andrew's link to the library hotel in midtown Manhattan? But it's more likely to be a wellies and fishing rods week in rainswept Ireland. I'll have to take several copies of Family Circle then.

make some hand made cards. Despite being for the most part quite creatively challenged, I do make nice cards. A rather posh woman at a wedding once offered to sell anything I made at her rather chi-chi boutique in Berkshire. But it wouldn't be fun then, would it?

But for now, I'm just going to make a nice pot of tea and settle down to watch the last part of tonight's scary, scary Haunted. Since M is fishing until the early hours, it's a good job I've got a big hairy German Shepherd curled up at my feet...

Goede nacht, tot morgen.

2003-09-04T12:23:00.000+01:00

What we're eating a lot of chez Daisy...

Pasta with crushed peas and tomatoes

An amended version of a recipe seen in Family Circle magazine. I buy it for the recipes ok?

Serves 4 normal people (or 2 ~~piggy~~ very hungry people with just enough left over to reheat for a tasty lunch the following day).

I think this would be popular with children - you could replace the bacon with mushrooms if they have veggie tendencies (but haven't tested this).

Ingredients

400g (140z) linguine (tagliatelle or spaghetti are also fine)
110-220g (4-8oz) bacon, cut into small pieces
1 large (or 2 small) red onion, finely chopped
1 small packet (around 250g or 9oz) frozen peas (broad beans will probably be nice too, will test next week and update)
At least 220g (8oz) cherry tomatoes (or any tomatoes will do, whatever's on the reduced counter or looking lonely at the bottom of the fridge)
Small tub of crème fraiche (half fat tastes better than full fat)

Method

Get the water boiling for the pasta and start cooking it according to packet instructions.

Heat a heavy based saucepan (I use a wok) and add the bacon. Cook for two minutes then add the onion and saute until transparent.

Add the tomatoes, cook until soft then add the frozen peas. Cook for a further 2-3 minutes.

Take off the heat, add the crème fraiche stirring all the while. Put the pan back on a low heat for a minute or two and stir until the crème fraiche is mixed in with the rest of the ingredients.

Take a potato masher and lightly "mash" the mixture.

The pasta should be cooked by now, drain and add to the main mixure, stirring all the time.

Serve with crusty bread, grated parmeggiano and a nice bottle of plonk.

Deeeeelishus!

Essex earthquake

2003-09-03T12:23:00.000+01:00

From the inbox

Earthquake rocks Essex

Epicentre: Basildon, Essex.

Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering "fackin ell" and "whatta cant" The earthquake decimated the area causing approximately £30.00 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and Spanish Costa's were damaged beyond repair.

Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giro arrived. Essex FM News (State Radio Station) reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Basildon.

One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Kilroy the next morning."

Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as normal.

The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny Delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, which include benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.

HOW CAN YOU HELP

This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing, parcels for those unfortunate to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after, items most needed include:
Fila or Burberry baseball caps
Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
Shell suits (female)
White sport socks
Rockport boots and any other items usually sold in Primark.
Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
Required foodstuffs include Microwave meals, tins of baked beans, ice cream and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew. 22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms, £2.00 buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9, £5.00 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.
Please do not send tents for shelter, as the sight of posh housingis unfair on the population or neighbouring areas of Vange, Pitsea and Laindon.

Breaking news**
Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in claret - "where are you bleeding from?" they asked - "Romford" said the girl - "but woss that got to do wiv it?"

And a timely reminder that the class system is alive and kicking in the UK...

Oh and apologies to non UK visitors, if any of this doesn't make sense, leave a comment!

2003-09-01T15:24:00.000+01:00

From the inbox

Thought for the day

2003-09-01T00:34:00.000+01:00

Thought for the day

Look away now if you don't listen to the Archers.

Can anyone tell me why Sonja (Greg's daughter) talks with an English accent? If she's been living in France for a number of years, especially growing up there and going to a French school, surely she'd speak with an accent? And not refer to the icecream as "delish".

Quote of the day

2003-09-01T00:24:00.000+01:00

Quote of the day

"My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance."
Anon

From daily to weekly...

2003-08-28T01:07:00.000+01:00

From daily to weekly...

I've really missed catching up on everyone's news but things should get a little easier on the work front soon.

So before I go have a wander over for a visit, here are some linky dinks.

The UK Culture Secretary Tessa Jowell has apparently said "It's fashionable to knock the number of repeats on television and blame the laziness of the broadcasters. But I believe there's a real public service in keeping these memories alive." She was talking about "the classics" but it got me thinking about the programmes I'd like to see repeated. First thoughts are Nice Town with Paul McGann and Josette Simon (did anyone watch this apart from me?); Marion and Geoff (one of the best things on tv in the past twenty years) and Belle and Sebastian (loved this as a child). Oh and Alan Bennett's Talking Heads monologues. Especially the one with Thora Hird. So what would you like to see repeated?

I also heard about a play shown about 15 years ago where Timothy Spall plays Margaret Rutherford. That would be a good repeat, no? And how could I forget NYPD Blue? My first job as world leader would be to show daily repeats...

Of course if I were world leader I would need perfect hair so I'd have to find a minion to do the measuring and timing involved since Ananova reports that "Experts have devised a formula for what they believe is the perfect hair wash":

Tests were carried out over six-months on more than 500 volunteers to examine different methods of wetting, lathering and rinsing hair.

The result is a strict combination which differs depending on the length of the hair.

The formula was devised by scientists at the research centre of beauty product brand Dove in Port Sunlight, Merseyside.

According to its scientists, only running water at a temperature of 36.7 C should be used.

People with short hair should use no more than 6ml of shampoo, medium length 8ml, and long 10ml. Lathering should last 28 seconds and involve 20 rubs.

Hair should then be rinsed for at least 22 seconds and repeated once to ensure cleanliness from the root to the tip.

The experts say conditioner is essential to complete the perfect wash.

Again, the amount recommended depends on the length of hair - 2ml for short, 4ml for medium, and 6ml for long.

The conditioner should be applied with a wide-toothed comb and left for 57 seconds before rinsing with water at 36.7 C.

Guess I'll have to live with imperfect hair for a while yet then.

Still on the girlie front, my hopes were raised a little at the headline "Elderly women boost sexy lingerie company".

Elderly women are the secret of success for a sexy lingerie company in Chile.

Freya lingerie has become known as the 'hot grandmas' company' because of its policy of hiring only elderly women in its Santiago factory. Maria Maldonado, who runs Freya with her two daughters, came up with the idea. One of the daughters, Erika Marchant, told Las Ultimas Noticias online: "No one would give the elderly an opportunity, so we decided to do it. "They are cleaner and more organised. Plus they make good style suggestions."

I guess they're not quite "hot" enough to start modelling the stuff then...

Other trivia learned while listening to late night quizes on LBC: Andy Garcia was born one of conjoined twins and Margaret Rutherford and Tony Benn were cousins.

And finally, here's an "oops" moment if I ever I heard one...

Nos da.

Popping in to say a quick howdy doo da

2003-08-20T00:42:00.000+01:00

Popping in to say a quick howdy doo da

It's all been a bit frantic here, too few hours in the day to cope with all the deadlines. A real stress fest. I've barely had time to read blogs, let alone find any new ones so this will be a linkally challenged post I'm afraid. That's not a real word, is it? Any suggestions?

We didn't make the Wag & Bone show - I was already worried about going there on such a hot day but in the end it was decided for us as a certain furry monster decided to come into season the day before. There is no way I would take a bitch in heat to a venue teeming with hundreds of male dogs all trying to have their evil way with her.

So to avoid the heat (in both senses), we're walking them late at night and getting reacquainted with the nocturnal wildlife. I wish I had a penny for every hedgehog I've tripped over since last week. And the bats! Eeeuw. I considered finding a beekeeper's bonnet but I do have some standards left, even at this advanced age...

I was looking for the translation of thank you in Arabic the other day when I came across a really useful site. Ever needed to translate "I have seen many films with beautiful blonde Swedish women"? Go here immediately!

It's funny what turns up when you're looking for a Greek font. Do know how to say Daisy in Greek? No? Go here and read all about Nteizi's Little Trip. Cool. If that fails to please then you could try the chat up lines here.

If you're not in the mood for learning useful foreign phrases then maybe you'd prefer to get creative and draw an eastender. Or you could check out the artwork at digital blasphemy (thanks to Nina for that).

Need something to stretch the grey matter? How about Meg's quiz?

So what you have you all been up to while I've been away? I know that Estella has been making me giggle tonight, as always and Harriet has written a novel in two short paragraphs. Me wishes me could write like that.

Oh dear, Karan is forced to blog via Western Union - hope it all gets fixed soon Karan! I think it's the strain of all those yodelling links.

Right, I'm off to bed. Night, night.

Canine flavour

2003-08-14T00:42:00.000+01:00

Canine flavour

As we limber up to sweep the boards at the annual Wag and Bone Show*, a few doggie links to get us in the mood.

First up is the Dog Dictionary, then there's blogdogs (check the road signs section). Going on holiday and want to embarrass the pooch? And how about analyzing your pet's name.

* this might be an outright lie. Ed.

Ben Hammersley's best post ever

2003-08-12T00:28:00.000+01:00

And finally

Have lots of links to catch up on but it's late, it's hot and I'm off to bed. Just one for all you dog/music/technology fans out there: Ben Hammersley's best post ever.

New toy alert

2003-08-11T23:16:00.000+01:00

New toy, new toy!

Lovely Graeme has found a fantastic site for the creatively challenged amongst us - Caption Thing.

It's worth sitting in a puddle of sweat for this, eh?

Why Girls Are Wierd

2003-08-11T22:41:00.000+01:00

Why Girls Are Wierd

Over a week later and I still haven't ordered Why Girls are Wierd but reading Bookworm reminded me - I've read the excerpts and the author has a website, pamie.com. Be sure to click on "the lotion and the basket". Now that's what I call an imagination...

Doonesbury on blogging

2003-08-11T22:39:00.000+01:00

This one's

... for Manly: Doonesbury on blogging.

Thanks to nowhere for the link.

Permalinks

2003-08-08T20:42:00.000+01:00

Permalinks

Well done Blogger. A new, much faster Knowledge Base has appeared, making it much easier to search for information. I've just been looking at the page on permalinks and there's even a link to Tom Coates' excellent post on the history of permalinks.

So let's try publishing and see if it now works...

Nope, not working. But I keep getting an error message (like most bloggers at the moment) so I'll come back and try tomorrow.

Wireless News (sniff, sniff)

2003-08-08T16:12:00.000+01:00

Wireless News (sniff, sniff)

If you do nothing else this week, please go and listen to "The Karma of Canine", by Patricia Ferguson.
"A father discovers that man's best friend doesn't always obey the laws of physics."

It'll be on the BBC website until Friday, 15 August. And now I'm going to go find another box of tissues...

Bzzz, bzzz, buzzzzy bee

2003-08-08T15:36:00.000+01:00

Bzzz, bzzz, buzzzzy bee

But a couple of things from the inbox.

Nothing of note

2003-08-07T17:37:00.000+01:00

Nothing of note

Listening to Damian Rice (I'm sorry, he does sound like a young Chris de Burgh) and Train 'cos I can't fix permalinks while Bleugger is broken and anyway I've got too much work to do. So there.

But I did get a good google referral today: i am the cheese and its pessimistic. Poor cheese.

Have a nice day.

Google referral by typo

2003-08-06T23:28:00.000+01:00

Google referral by typo

james bond music for claranet pieces

"Did you mean: james bond music for clarinet pieces"

Heh.

More diverting tactics

2003-08-06T23:11:00.000+01:00

More diverting tactics

Create your own Mondrian

Thanks to red writing for the link.

If you...

2003-08-06T17:45:00.000+01:00

If you...

were getting married and 'appened to be a rather good website designer, wouldn't you register the domain name themarriage.co.uk and get some clever advertising in for the vendors? Mmm? Me too!Thanks to utterly boring for the link.

Then how about weighing your degree certificate and calculate how much it cost per kilogram. From the excellent pop dizzy.

Out of the mouths...

2003-08-06T15:22:00.000+01:00

Out of the mouths...

Young american wisdom.

"Never trust a dog to watch your food."
Patrick, age 10

"When your dad is mad and asks you, 'Do I look stupid?' don't answer."
Hannah, 9

"Never tell your mum her diet's not working."
Michael, 14

"When your mum is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair".
Taylia, 10

"Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic-Tac."
Andrew, 9

"Never hold a vacuum and a cat at the same time."
Kyoyo, 9

"You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk."
Armir, 9

"Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts."
Kellie, 11

"If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse."
Naomi, 15

"Felt markers are not good to use as lipstick."
Lauren, 9

"Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.
Joel, 10

"When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mum when she's on the phone."
Alyesha, 13

"Never try to baptise a cat. "
Eileen, 8

Thanks to the challenge.

Newsflash

2003-08-06T10:20:00.000+01:00

Newsflash

Go listen to BBC Radio Five Live (you can listen online). Madeleine says she's wrapping up her blog. No, no, no. We want recipes! We want Madeleine to carry on blogging! We think she's a wuss for giving up so soon!

Here's her post for today:

The time has come, the walrus says, to talk of many things. Mainly about blogs. Today, on Radio Five Live (909 and 693 MV in Britain), also available via live webstreaming here we're wrapping up Madeleine's Kitchen Challenge with a discussion about blogs with a couple of people who know. We'll also be conducting a live web chat of sorts, so go to the website to log on and chat about blogging.

Thanks to all those who've read my blog, and who've contributed either via email or on the comments. Thanks especially to Daisy who tried her damnedest to make me into a proper blogger, and Andrew who helped me do stuff.

To find out what I really thought of blogging, go to the Five Live site and listen to the chatter. If the best thing I can say about it is that I learnt a few new recipes, then that's not bad.

Please go visit and persuade her to continue blogging. And get on the phone/Five Live site to join in the discussion!

That's 11:30 BST, just over an hour from now.

Spotlight update

2003-08-06T01:13:00.000+01:00

Spotlight update

I've been enjoying medpundit's "commentary on medical news by a practicing physician". It's not just that the medical content (ranging from childhood vaccines to AIDS prejudice) is so well written. There's much, much more.

For example, there's a link to a letter from an angry resident of Hudson, Ohio in the Beacon Journal about the recent floods:

'... in the hands of an angry God'

The next time Hudson wants to host a Harry Potter festival, it should think again. On June 20 the city had thousands of Potter fanatics parading their enthusiasm for sorcery downtown. Parents were leading the way in this witchcraft. I was there with a team to oppose that way of life and belief system. I held a sign that said: "Those who practice magic arts (sorcery) -- their place will be in the fiery lake of burning sulfur.''

Many people mocked us.

Thirty days later, they are engulfed in a flood. This should serve as an example to other communities not to lead the way in evil. If you need another signature from God, perhaps a zigzag, lightning-bolt shape burned into Hudson's landscape would be appropriate, just like the one burned onto Harry Potter's forehead.

Now repent and turn to Jesus. Or you'll need many fire extinguishers, not just an ark, to escape the floodwaters.

Mark Tatton
Cuyahoga Falls

Enjoy.

2003-08-05T12:39:00.000+01:00

From the inbox

You might have read this before but it still makes me chuckle.

Brother Joseph entered the Monastery of Silence.
The Priest said, "Brother, this is a silent monastery.
You are welcome here as long as you like, but you may not speak until I direct you to do so".

Brother Joseph lived in the monastery for 5 years before the Priest said to him, "Brother Joseph, you have been here for 5 years. You can speak two words."
Brother Joseph said, "Hard bed."
"I'm sorry to hear that," the Priest said, "We will get you a better bed."

After another 5 years, Brother Joseph was called by the Priest. "You may say another two words, Brother Joseph."
"Cold food," said Brother Joseph, and the Priest assured him that the food would be better in the future.

On his 15th anniversary at the monastery, the Priest again called Brother Joseph into his office.
"You may say two words today."
"I quit," said Brother Joseph.
"It's probably best", said the Priest, "You've done f**k all but moan since you've been here.

Thanks to Jane.

2003-08-05T12:23:00.000+01:00

Stop animal slavery!

I feel a bit bad joking about it, so here's a link to the RSPCA (UK)

2003-08-05T07:45:00.000+01:00

Silly Daisy

Oh Karan, what have you done? I've got a huge workload today and where do I keep sneaking off to? The Advertising Slogan Generator, that's where. See what happens?

You'll Never Put A Better Bit Of Daisy On Your Knife.
Nobody Does It Like Daisy.
Don't You Just Love Being In Daisy?
All Daisy, All The Time.
It's That Daisy Feeling.
Fast Daisy and Good for You.

Maybe She's Born With It, Maybe It's Flummel.
Flummel-Lickin' Good.
A Flummel Works Wonders.

Richard: The Other White Meat.
There's More Than One Way To Eat A Richard.

A Lazy Laces A Day Helps You Work, Rest and Play.
For Mash, Get Lazy Laces.
Hand-Built by Lazy Laces.

Out Of The Strong Came Forth Quickos.
Let Your Fingers Do the Walking Through the Quickos.
Full Of Eastern Quickos.

Keep That Sevitz Complexion.
What Would You Do For A Sevitz?

At 29p a Hairy Dog, It's Not a Stress on Your Pocket.
Super Hairy Dog is Almost Here.

You'll Wonder Where the Yellow Went, When You Brush Your Teeth with Mandarin Meg.

Simple Impartial Green Fairy.
Green Fairy Comes to Those Who Wait.
Green Fairy Keeps Going and Going.

New! The Manly Special!

Manly - It Looks Good on You.
Strong Enough for a Man, Made for a Manly.
Just Do Manly.
Sharing the Manly of your Life.
I Was a Manly Weakling.
A Smooth-Running Manly is a Relaxing Experience.
Manly Saves Your Soul.
Big Chocolate Manly.
The Sweet You Can't Eat Without Manly.
Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizz, Oh, What a Manly it is!
3-in-1 Protection for your Manly.
Make Someone Happy with a Manly.
Ding-Dong! Manly Calling!
All You Need is a Manly and a Dream.
Ribbed For Her Manly.
I Feel Like Manly Tonight.

Go on, we can't have just the one addict in the family!

p.s. When you can tear myself away from the slogan generator, there's more to The Surrealist. Go look see. Enjoy.

2003-08-05T07:15:00.000+01:00

Holy spam!

I'm so used to seeing spam for "member enhancing products" and the like that it came as quite a surprise to see this one today:

We are now providing this unique opportunity for Christians all over the world to purchase Holy Water from the most prestigious of all pilgrim centers.

Direct from Lourdes!

You can use it for yourself or you can also use it as great gifts to your loved ones and family.

CLICK HERE TO PLACE YOUR ORDER TODAY...HURRY SUPPLIES ARE LIMITED

2003-08-04T23:29:00.000+01:00

Too hot for Horlicks

So a few links before bedtime.

Don't know why I haven't come across bookblog before but I'm glad I found it via fiendish plot who writes at lost in transit which also brought me to shauny (who is very, very funny). And breathe.

Then I came across feeling listless via Richard's "list of nearby websites" (500 miles? Nearby?). We'll gloss over the
Belgian photo story (wierd but curiously addictive) and move swiftly on to an interview by Emily Dubberley with Mil Millington of things my girlfriend and I have argued about fame which came via a comment at by Joe at Zoe's.

Still with me? Okay. Then there's a lovely photoblog at orbit1, who comes to us via sensitive light, who has been picked as one of the featured photographers in this month’s edition of 28mm (hooray!). As for great design, I've no idea who Peter and Megan are (apart from the info on the site) but it's something to do with a fringe festival thingy and I'm too tired to google it now. Anyway, they've got a rather swish wedding blog here. See what you can do with Blogger when you know how?

Oh and the other day I mentioned that biting nails was wondering why people were ending up at her site through searching for a certain term. I won't mention that term again because now I'm getting googled for it. It's the signature of this guy. If you're interested in anti smoking campaigns, he's worth a visit. Cough. Pass me a Malboro.

2003-08-04T11:05:00.000+01:00

I think this little critter

Has been studying too.

2003-08-04T11:01:00.000+01:00

Flummeling is also good for you

Where else would I have been persuaded to go look at a site all about physics? And enjoy it?

2003-08-03T15:29:00.000+01:00

It was bound to happen

Jane has spotted a new book, Why Girls Are Weird : A Novel

Here's the Amazon blurb:

She was just writing a story.

When Anna Koval decides to creatively kill time at her library job in Austin by teaching herself HTML and posting partially fabricated stories about her life on the Internet, she hardly imagines anyone besides her friend Dale is going to read them. He's been bugging her to start writing again since her breakup with Ian over a year ago. And so what if the "Anna K" persona in Anna's online journal has a fabulous boyfriend named Ian? It's not like the real Ian will ever find out about it.

The story started writing itself.

Almost instantly Anna K starts getting e-mail from adoring fans that read her daily postings religiously. One devotee, Tess, seems intent on becoming Anna K's real-life best friend and another, a male admirer who goes by the name of "Ldobler," sounds like he'd want to date Anna K if she didn't already have a boyfriend. Meanwhile, the real Anna can't help but wonder if her newfound fans like her or the alter ego she's created. It's only a matter of time before fact and fiction collide and force Anna to decide not only who she wants to be with, but who she wants to be.

Anyone read it yet?

2003-08-03T15:01:00.000+01:00

Mission statement

Why do I update this blog?

To link and share things I've enjoyed

To enjoy the sense of community

To learn more about html, css and Other Things (eventually)

I am the most apolitical person you could meet. I don't read newspapers, I just about keep up with current affairs by listening to BBC Radio 4 (short bulletins only, thank you) but I do read lot. Huge amounts. And sometimes politics gets in the way of a good read.

The only time I will get involved in discussion of politics is when my "intolerance/unfairness antenna" starts wiggling. I am my father's daughter. Involvement usually means ignoring the source of that intolerance but sometimes I'll speak up. And sometimes I get it wrong. I posted the link to the Margaret Drabble article because it seemed odd to be so angry at her that she would "award" her alongside some fairly unsavoury characters. Why? Because she spoke out against the Bush and Blair governments?

I have the feeling that one of the biggest differences between the US and the UK (the UK specifically rather than Europe as a whole) is in our attitude to our leaders. Where most Americans treat the presidency with some reverence (while recognising the faults of the man in office), we tend to make almost a sport of knocking the prime minister, whatever flavour of politics he or she represents.

We can't ask Margaret Drabble to explain her writing but I can explain my understanding of it: I didn't --and still don't-- see the piece as being anti American. I see it as railing against the US government and its multi million dollar corporations who seek to globalise, not against the American people.

2003-08-01T16:51:00.000+01:00

Shifting opinions

I've just been reading an excellent article by Margaret Drabble about her feelings towards the side of America we've seen since George Bush was elected.

I hate feeling this hatred. I have to keep reminding myself that if Bush hadn't been (so narrowly) elected, we wouldn't be here, and none of this would have happened. There is another America. Long live the other America, and may this one pass away soon.

I came across it via Kelley at suburban blight who strangely awards Ms Drabble the Unmitigated Twat of the Week award alongside the murderer/manslaughterer/just plain stupid (depending on your viewpoint) Chante Jawan Mallard and a cruel woman who convinced a couple that she was their long missing daughter.

2003-08-01T14:52:00.000+01:00

Warning

Don't go and check out 20 questions until you have some time to spare. Brilliant. Via hairy dog, via via kottke.

2003-08-01T12:14:00.000+01:00

Film titles as links

The good, the baaad and the ugly. Via scoble and water.

2003-08-01T09:32:00.000+01:00

Inspired

Been impressed by all the wonderful work done for 26 things? Me too. But the inventiveness and "makes me giggle" award™ must go to Manly for his 26 alternative things. Go enjoy.

I'm just off to record the sound of cornflakes floating in milk.

2003-08-01T02:33:00.000+01:00

One quick link

A Washington Post article by Leslie Walker on a new blogging system called netomat. Thanks to gotfoo.

Zed is looking for something to keep her awake and increase her energy levels, while biting nails ("age: 40 and adjusting") is wondering why people are looking for ezechiele2002.

And now I'm going to bed to see if I can get some sleep.

2003-07-31T14:29:00.000+01:00

All charges against John Leslie dropped

Via the BBC. Will this change the way the media in this country are allowed to act? Will the law be changed to allow anonymity for those accused of rape? Will this stop non-entities like Matthew Wright trying to attract publicity to their low rating shows by "accidentally" revealing Leslie's name on air?

*Sigh* Nothing will change. But I hope Leslie sues the bastards for every penny they've got.

2003-07-31T08:47:00.000+01:00

Trailer Trash Family back again!

Or is it just for one post? I'm keeping fingers, toes and all dangly bits crossed that we'll see more.

In a (rare) burst of pedantry I'll say to Bertha Mae that "It's a sad, sad day fer folks in the good ol' U.S. of A." does Mr Hope a disservice - he will be missed around the world. And let's not forget that he was born in Greenwich*, England (*pronounced "Grennich").

Talking of "Americans" who weren't actually born in the US, John Mahoney who plays Frasier's*** father Martin Crane was also born in England (Manchester). And Will & Grace's Eric McCormack is Canadian**.

Can you think of any others?

** I settled down the other night to watch his appearance on V Graham Norton only to find that A Certain Person had taped a bloody fishing programme over it. Bah humbug.

***And while we're talking about Frasier, is it my imagination or did Frasier say at one stage (while he was still sitting on a stool in Cheers) that his father was a successful lawyer?

Anyway, back to work...

2003-07-30T23:41:00.000+01:00

Quick links

Two very striking layouts at GotFoo and Richard D Bartlett (who seems to be shutting up shop. Shame.)

A sad reflection from Michael at The Lingering Lemon of Death (via Carol at Odds & Ends).

Fancy a spot of headspinning? Go here, thanks to Robyn.

Or maybe some (quite justified) Belgium bashing (via au currant who in turn came via Gert who writes an excellent piece on exposure).

And finally, some music to avoid prostate cancer by.

Which leads me neatly into the latest joke to hit the inbox.

The Queen was visiting one of London's top hospitals and she specified she wanted to see absolutely everything.
During her tour of the floors she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating.
"Oh my", said the Queen, "that's disgraceful, what is the meaning of this?"
The Doctor leading the tour explains. "I am sorry Your Majesty, but this man has a very serious medical condition and is only following doctors orders. His body produces too much semen and his testicles keep overfilling. Until we can find out exactly what is causing this problem he's been instructed to do that at least 5 times a day or there is a danger that his testicles will explode, and he would die instantly."
"Oh, I am so sorry", said the Queen.
On the next floor they passed a room where a young nurse was giving a patient a blow-job. "Oh my", said the Queen, "What's happening in there?"
The Doctor replied,"Same problem, but he's with Bupa."

Good night and sweet dreams.

2003-07-30T22:56:00.000+01:00

Bloogle Google searches

Evan Williams (Blogger god) has a great reply to some of the "google is screwing up results with blog listings" debate with Deconstructing Matt's Google blog spam example.

BTW, with a name like that do you think he has Welsh parentage?

2003-07-30T22:11:00.000+01:00

Ding!

How do you store your sheets and pillowcases? In the airing cupboard? Me too. And do you have "sets", I mean pillowcases that match particular quilt covers? Even worse, do you have sets in more than one size? Our bed is king size, there are double sheets for the sofa bed and singles for the guest bed. That's a lot of cotton sitting in piles in a hot airing cupboard. And how many times do you have to sort through said piles to find a matching set? You too? Well listen up, I've had inspiration.

I just emptied the cupboard and spent an hour putting them back in - but in sets. Yep, a single white bottom sheet with a single white top sheet and two plain white pillowcases, along with a pretty blue quilt cover embroidered with daisies. I even tucked everything into the folds of the quilt cover so that I can just reach in and pull them out in one go. If I was really dedicated I could buy a few metres of ribbon and loosely tie them up, like parcels. But no, I didn't label them.

Heh, I could give Martha Stewart a run for her money today!

2003-07-29T19:59:00.000+01:00

Phact or Photoshop?

Thanks to je blog.

2003-07-29T14:57:00.000+01:00

Afternoon tea

Instead of a cuppa, here's a great limerick from Graham Lester.

Sylvester found out his wife Lisa
Had hired a detestable geezer
To kill him – how bad!
But he really got mad
When he found it was charged to his Visa

There's an interesting article on Paul Auster via Alaina and for Madeleine there's the Julie/Julia Project (don't read this if you haven't had lunch yet, it will make you very hungry).

If I can find a way to disable the clock mouse trail thingy I'll be going back for more of in the aquarium. "When is a smoothie not a smoothie? When it's a lumpie." Heh. Great blog and lovely artwork.

2003-07-29T09:10:00.000+01:00

Wow

Go take a look at samorost. (Via out of character and styrofoam kitty.)

2003-07-29T08:06:00.000+01:00

By jove, he's done it!

Once again the blogging community does what it does best.

Here's what the problem was. I used to put the comment script in each post rather than have it as part of the template. Which has worked fine for months. But Pyra/Google changed things over the weekend which made that not work any more. This was complicated by the fact that there were also problems over at enetation (who were VERY helpful).
Following DVD's wonderful instructions overnight, I've added the enetation script to the template and now y'all can comment again.

So I've gone from this

to this

*Sigh*. One big happy teddy.

DVD - I owe you big time!

2003-07-29T07:53:00.000+01:00

And again

2003-07-29T07:46:00.000+01:00

One more little test...

2003-07-29T00:57:00.000+01:00

Message for bignjuicy

I've just reported the problem to Blogger, as soon as I get a response I'll post the information here in case it's of any use to you.

As for dvd. What can I say?

Missing the comments? Mail me!

2003-07-28T23:31:00.000+01:00

How about a bit of motivation?

2003-07-28T22:59:00.000+01:00

Are the A Team out there?

John over at the enetation forum tells us that we need to fix summat in Blogger but I don't know what to do *blows nose* and *wailing* I hate it when comments are broken 'cos *sniff* it's the only thing that keeps me going and *another hankie* the poor dogs are started to look really worried 'cos my face is getting all red and puffy *sob* 'cos I don't know whaaaaaaaaaat to doooooooo.

Updated to say: I'm even more of a plonker that I thought... you can't leave a comment telling me um, how to fix my comments so *sigh* you could email me? She says, hopefully...?

2003-07-28T14:12:00.000+01:00

From the inbox

One day in the future, George W. Bush has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the Devil is waiting for him.

"I don't know what to do here", says the Devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a couple folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."

Bush thought that sounded pretty good, so the Devil opened the first room. In it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No", George said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that all day long."

The Devil led him to the next room. In it was Newt Gingrich with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day", commented George.

The devil opened a third door. In it, Bush saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Bush took a look around in disbelief and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this."

The Devil smiled sardonically and said...

"OK, Monica, you're free to go."

2003-07-27T16:06:00.000+01:00

Another quickie

... to note that Karan over at flummel hasn't been able to update for a few days (hosting problems) but will be back soon. In the meantime you could go and enjoy her TypePad beta blog.

She also put me on to a good explanation of RSS which I've been ignoring until now because to be honest I thought RSS (and trackback) was "something for the big boys" but I'm starting to understand that it's useful for the pond life too...

And now back to work.

2003-07-27T15:04:00.000+01:00

Quick links

While stalking the enetation forum for news of the database transfer (and when comments will be fixed), I came across big n juicy (must go back and read more) and from there graham lester's limerick a day. Enjoy.

An adventurous fellow from Lawrence
Took a flight on a plane to see Florence
But the trip was a pain
For it pelted with rain
And she met him with downright abhorrence

2003-07-26T15:04:00.000+01:00

Wireless news

If you have some time this weekend, go listen to Friday's Afternoon play, "Something You Should Know" by Trevor Lock and Sem Devillart.

"Max would rather hide from the real world than live in it. Then he has a close encounter with a flying pig."
Lasts around 45 minutes. Very entertaining.

Afraid comments are down this weekend but if you do listen and enjoy, come back and tell us!

2003-07-25T22:38:00.000+01:00

Achoo

I haven't stopped sneezing for the past hour, my bones are aching, even my fingernails hurt, so a few quick links and then off to bed.

First up is toasty critter heads and then I wonder if this is taking proofreading a little too far?

Then there are some pictures of the part of Wales I grew up in - Ystradfellte and Pen-y-fan, Corn Ddu & Cribyn.

I've been looking for some online language learning sites for my father and came across Unforgettable Languages - "the simple Linkword© learning method developed by Dr. Michael Gruneberg to lock words into your memory in a matter of seconds".

Lock a word in your memory in 10 seconds!
The Portuguese word for Bed is Cama
Imagine a Camel lying in your Bed.

Why does he suddenly want to learn Portuguese? A family has just moved into the house next door and although the husband speaks perfect English (he has lived in Wales for about four years), his wife and two children don't yet speak any English. He's been struggling with a Teach Yourself Portuguese book from the library but they don't have any tapes there so I'm looking for a site that also has audio.

That's it, I'm done. Bed. Boa noite

2003-07-25T09:26:00.000+01:00

Blogging community

Huge thanks to Karan for tipping me off that the dotted boxes I use for quoted text are overlaying the right hand column.

Not only that, she explained in detail why it was happening and how I could fix it. *Big Smile*. So I've changed the width from 400px to 250px, could y'all let me know if anything's amiss? Should I go down a little more even, to 200px?

This means that the box is 400 (the cell size) + 5 + 5 (these are the padding spaces) + 1 (this is the border) pixels wide… for a total of 411 pixels in a column that seems to be about 250 pixels wide. The only place for the excess amount to go is into the territory designated as the right column.

2003-07-25T00:48:00.000+01:00

And while we're on the subject of referrals...

I'm going to make a couple of you (no names, no pack drill) green with envy when I reveal how many searches involving the delectable Fiona Bruce end up here...

There's Fiona Bruce smoking and Fiona Bruce fan site and even Fiona Bruce legs for starters. I'll skip lightly over the more sordid episodes 'cos you're a nice innocent bunch of folks and I'd hate to show you a side of the internet you're unaware of... ;-))

Heh, I must admit I'd miss the googling if when I move to MT...

2003-07-25T00:20:00.000+01:00

By way of google referrals

I've been chuckling over this A-Z of Belgium by a professor in Surrey who seems like a Jolly Nice Chap. A few snippets:

Dutch A strange language spoken in Flanders and consisting largely of the consonants v,s,c,h,r and k. Dutch is surprisingly easy to learn. Simply fill your mouth with crisps and then speak English and German simultaneously without breathing.

Duvel A legendary trap for foreigners. A seemingly harmless golden liquid that looks refreshing and spiritually uplifting. In reality a brew of the devil, designed to reach into the soul and extract foolishness, talkativeness, speech disorders and nausea.

Verschrikkelijk The first word spoken by most Belgian children. Helps to develop the tonsils and remove any misplaced fish-bones from the back of the throat.

Wablief A useful phrase that is guaranteed to fool Dutch speakers about your language skills. Repeat ad nauseum until the conversation clearly ends or the other speaker walks away in frustration. This trick will probably also work when talking to a French speaker.

Witloof A curious bitter vegetable that is positively venerated by Belgians. Surprisingly good in soup, but best drenched in cheese and baked thoroughly. Adoration of this vegetable reaches its peak during the winter season, when crowds can be season inspecting and sniffing candidate purchases at market places. Referred to as "chicory" in other countries and usually fed to pigs.

Yves The name of all male Belgians from the bottom lumpy bit.

As for the google search, I'd say try Mairks (where "air" is pronounced like um, "air" in English and the "r" should be rolled a bit).

Addictive

2003-07-24T13:30:00.000+01:00

Addictive

In case you haven't visited headCleaner() (you should), go have a listen here.

He writes: You'll need sound for this. Click on each horse in turn and then experiment. Strangely serene.

Timely advice for us wimmin folk

2003-07-24T09:32:00.000+01:00

Timely advice for us wimmin folk

Light a fire for him to unwind by... catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
Let him talk first. Remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
Don't complain if he's late home for dinner, or even if he stays out all night.
Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement... You have no right to question him.

Having lost my way a little there I'm now back on track after reading the wonderful advice contained in the "Good Wife's Guide" via Lorraine.

Compare and contrast

2003-07-23T19:02:00.000+01:00

Compare and contrast

Guilty of killing three people by drink driving. Sentenced to four-and-a-half years in prison.
Guilty of three counts of distributing a computer virus. Sentenced to two years in prison.

Justice sucks.

Dogs in cars

2003-07-23T16:59:00.000+01:00

Dogs in cars

There's a terribly sad story on the Amarillo Global News site (via Dog News).

Police Chief Don L. Carter said Monday that he wants to find a replacement for Sandor, a Belgian Malinois that died July 15 when a patrol car's air conditioning failed on a 100-degree day.

Sandor's handler, Rodney Stevens, left the dog in the car for about half an hour July 15 to go into the police department and do some paperwork. Police working dogs aren't suited to an office environment, so department procedures called for leaving the dog in the car with the engine on and air conditioner running.

About half an hour after going inside, Stevens went out and found the dog dead and the air conditioner blowing nothing but hot air.

Carter said now that he knows the loss of air conditioning is a possibility, even in a running car, the city will install a temperature monitoring device to protect the next dog. The devices recently have come down in cost to about $800.

Years ago a colleague of M's was on the beat (on patrol) somewhere in Notting Hill (London) when she spotted a dog panting heavily and obviously distressed in a locked car on hot day. After a quick check to locate the owner she used her truncheon to break the window and release the dog. Who panicked and ran straight out into the road to be killed instantly by a passing car.

No mechanical or computerised system is failsafe. Just don't leave dogs in cars.

2003-07-23T13:00:00.000+01:00

Eeh, books

A blog all about e-books points us to a parody from Planet PDF of Jakob Nielsen's diatribe "PDF: Unfit for Human Consumption". There was also a short discussion about this article at Electric Venom.

I create and edit Acrobat PDFs daily, in a number of languages. Despite its flaws (and oh there are many), a well produced PDF can be opened on any machine under any operating system in any part of the world and the reader will see exactly the same page. As a html/css newbie I'm not at all qualified to comment but I've read enough to know that getting html and css to work the same on all browers is a problem, never mind the OS and language issues.

Or am I wrong?

2003-07-23T11:48:00.000+01:00

Feeling fruity?

Go read The Manly Smell of a Pipe and see what this is all about... heh.

2003-07-22T17:34:00.000+01:00

Quote of the day

"No sense being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway."

And a warning to bloggers everywhere from John Robb. Via Scoble.

2003-07-22T10:24:00.000+01:00

Eh?

Since when has Amazon been peddling porn? I just did a quick search for digital radios on Amazon and kept getting "recommendations" for stuff like this and this. I don't mind, just a bit surprised.

2003-07-21T23:00:00.000+01:00

Design competition

Ben Hammersley is looking for a redesign, winning entry wins an iPod.

2003-07-21T09:56:00.000+01:00

New frocks

Thank you all for the compliments on the new look - as promised, here's the how, where and when.

I've been wanting a 3 column layout for a while but had been put off a little by reading of the difficulties in getting them to work properly on all browsers. Then using the 3 column look on my TypePad beta blog made me take the plunge.

But I wasn't quite ready to tackle it myself. So on Saturday evening I googled for ideas and came across blogstyles. For $18 you can buy a css stylesheet (for Blogger or MT). And of course the "learn by doing" theory held true, I learned more on Saturday night (through to Sunday morning...) than from hours of sitting reading chunky reference books. I also got to appreciate the wonders of blogrolling. I wanted to split that looooong blogroll into more manageable chunks. After only two "cut and pastes" I discovered that Blogrolling makes it really easy by allowing you to "move" urls from one list to another. Heh.

I'm going to change the pink at some stage and maybe get a nice logo across the top (probably inspired again by mandarin's wonderful gallery)

My brother (just starting up his own blog) prefers the old colour scheme. Must admit I miss that lime green a little too, but I'm so happy to have 3 columns, the colouring in can wait a little while.

And so back to business. More luvverly links laying in wait for you this lunchtime.

2003-07-21T00:36:00.000+01:00

Genius

Graeme has found this.

Is it time for Tony to receive his P45? Change the recipient by changing the URL. For readers outside the UK the P45 is the UK tax form you get when you leave a job, as such it is synonymous with getting the sack or being made redundant.

Personally I prefer this one. Well a girl can dream, eh?

2003-07-20T18:43:00.000+01:00

I'm moving

Who could resist a house in a town called Soddy Daisy, close by Chattanooga...

It's amazing what checking site referrals will throw up occasionally...

2003-07-20T18:25:00.000+01:00

Warning: rant ahead

Re: those money-grabbing b***** at Sky. Deep breath.

We pay nearly £40 each month for Sky tv. Mostly because much of the rugby is exclusive to Sky Sports (and you have to have the most expensive, all bells & whistles package to include the sports channels which show the rugby).

So last night we decided to watch a box office movie (Men in Black II). The telephone cable on our Sky digibox is broken, has been for months, but we don't use the interactive facilities so frankly why bother paying £70+ to get it fixed? On the rare occasions we want to watch a movie we ring up the Sky operators, tell them the channel and the start time and they do the rest.

Until last night. Apparently from now on we will be charged a £1 "booking fee" on top of the £3.50 to watch the film. Yeah right. Kiss my butt. Bye bye Sky movies. Since 90% of what comes out of Hollywood these days is crapola, I think we can hop in the car and go rent the remaining 10% from Blockbuster. Thank you very much.

Task for tonight: find the lowest priced Sky package that includes international rugby matches and switch.

2003-07-20T18:08:00.000+01:00

Tip of the day

When the weather is really hot and the dogs are lying in a heap on the floor too tired and sleepy to do anything... give 'em an icecube! We now have two energetic hairy monsters on our hands (and very wet floors)...

2003-07-20T12:32:00.000+01:00

Bless me father for I have sinned

At my age it takes a lot to shock. The Bush election; Gulf War II; the British tabloid press acting as judge, jury and executioner - nothing surprises me much these days.

Until I read this from inappropriate response highlighting a comment posted here.

... But I don't feel so insulted by the phone/television issue ever since I saw a patient do the same thing to her priest.

She was in the ICU, so I had a full view of her room from the nursing station where I was writing her transfer orders to send her to the floor. She was talking on the phone and watching television while the priest gave her the bread and wine of the Eucharist - on Easter Sunday. And as he walked away from the room, she was still chewing on the Host as she talked on the phone. Unbelievable.

Via Dean Esmay.

2003-07-20T02:41:00.000+01:00

Wireless news

There is a veritable cornucopia of delectable delights over on BBC Radio 4 today. For example:

11:15 Desert Island Discs with crime writer P D James

13:30 Sunday Best: Accepting Jack
Three families describe coming to terms with the birth of a child with a severe learning disability.

14:45 Forgotten Female Fossilists
In the mid nineteenth century Anna Thynne's collection of madrepore coral fossils led her to study living madrepores. But first she had to solve the problem of how to keep them alive far from the sea. Her solution led to the invention of the marine aquarium.

And then of course there's The Archers at 19:15 when Clarrie gets to hear the gossip about Adam...

Don't forget that you can listen to Radio 4 over the internet...

2003-07-20T02:12:00.000+01:00

Maggie's story

The final days of one much loved dog.

2003-07-20T01:13:00.000+01:00

Googling

Should you wish to Google™ for gladrags magazine nude (and why not?) you'll find two of your favourite bloggers listed.

Eeh, that's made my day!

2003-07-18T23:43:00.000+01:00

Practical jokes that have succeeded

Well almost.

My better half is a fisherman. Mad keen fisherman. And very good at it too. So off we went to Bredwardine for a long weekend's fishing. In February. Well he was fishing, I was lounging on the river bank ~~looking decorative~~ reading. And shivering. Over a meal in the pub that night everyone was bemoaning the fact that not a single barbel had been caught. At which point I concocted my plan. A few weeks previously I had bought a cheap (50p) plastic fish at a car boot sale. And I just happened to have packed it. Since it was minus something ridiculous celsius (if you stood still long enough icicles would form on the end of your nose), we were all gussied up with at least 6 layers of thick woollens and thermals. Perfect for hiding plastic fish, eh?

So we set of for the second day of fishing. Around mid morning I wandered off downstream to look for a suitable point at which to "catch" my fish. The plan was to wade into the water a little and produce this fish as if I'd caught it with my bare hands. Yes I know it sounds stupid now but at the time, etc.

What I hadn't reckoned on was that the banks of this stretch of the river were a good 3 metres high and there was no way on God's earth I would be able to get down to the river itself without risk of serious injury to body or clothing. Especially with a 10 inch plastic fish wedged in the waistband of my jeans. Hmm. So I wandered back, made another cup of tea and plotted.

"Could I have a go?" I said innocently? M was delighted. "Of course you can. Hang on a minute, I'll just set it up for you." So he put a few *shudder* maggots on a hook, did whatever you have to do to get the rod and centrepin reel ready and off I went. Well I sat down actually. You do a lot of that in fishing. The plastic fish was now starting to cause serious pain and discomfort. A distraction was needed. Tissues! I needed tissues and there were some in the car. So M set off to the car to get some tissues and I set about partially undressing to get the (by now) bloody uncomfortable fish from my nether regions. Except I didn't get that far. The reel started screaming. M came running back. "You've hooked a fish!" he said. I don't know which of us were the more shocked. So I listened to his instructions, let the fish take some line, reeled it back in a little, let it go a little (there's a lot of that in fishing) until finally M thought the fish was ready to be landed. Judging by how much that blighter pulled the line I was sure I had a 30lb monster on the end of the line so it was with some disgust that I inspected the 2lb 8oz barbel in the landing net. Still, a fish is a fish is a fish, eh?

And then I doubled over in agony. All that activity had shifted the fish further down my trousers and the tail was now actually cutting into my skin. So I undid my jeans and pulled it out. M's face was a picture. "What the ...?" So I explained. I don't know who started laughing first but it was one of those memorable times when you laugh and laugh until the tears are rolling down your face - you manage to control yourself and then catch the other person's eye and start all over again. A couple came by, walking their dog on the other side of the river, they called out to ask if we were okay. But we couldn't stop laughing long enough to reply. Apparently reassured they went on their way, shaking their heads in bewilderment.

So okay, the joke failed. But it's a lovely memory.

2003-07-18T23:01:00.000+01:00

Practical jokes that have gone wrong

Many years ago my brother and his wife were living away from home for the first time, he was managing a small store, not earning a large salary and money was tight - especially when the first baby came along. The family rallied round with gifts and money, etc. but still. They were saving up to buy Bailey's first pushchair but the bills were eating up all but a tiny portion of their income and progress was slow.

So I took it into my head one day to "donate anonymously". Knowing that my sister-in-law used to enter competitions on a regular basis, I typed up an official looking letter with the logo (photocopied from an advert in a magazine) of a well known chain store selling baby clothes and paraphernalia (and pushchairs) congratulating them on winning £50 worth of vouchers for this store. Even though it was in black and white I thought it looked pretty damn good. Hah!

I don't know who got suspicious first but someone did and my father rang the head office and queried the letter. They were mystified. "I'm sorry Mr --, we don't have any current promotions of that nature in store".

So I had to confess. Sigh. Moral of the tale? ~~Don't make up fake competition wins.~~ Find a colour photocopier and a real competition.

Of course now that we have colour printers and the ability to manipulate just about anything on the computer it would all be so much easier. Something to keep in mind for the great nieces and nephews...

2003-07-18T22:32:00.000+01:00

First there was Jaws...

Now there's something even more terrifying at the beach...

Thanks to Margi Lowry for the link, who in turn came via Venomous Kate.

2003-07-18T17:09:00.000+01:00

Voices in my head

Bloody hell, thanks to Gert I've been singing "I am sixteen, going on seventeen" all afternoon. In my head. Not out loud. Even I have limits. Even Come on Eileen won't dislodge it.

So any suggestions for a more street credworthy alternative?

And by the by, has anyone tried one of these?

2003-07-18T16:27:00.000+01:00

A lightbulb moment...

I wa just pootling round dvd's archives (as you do when it's Friday afternoon and you realise that you have at least 12 hours of work to fit in by the end of the day...) and found a review of the 1 Love (War Child) cd. And a link to the lyrics of Come on Eileen:

Poor old Johnny Ray
Sounded sad upon the radio
He moved a million hearts in mono
Our mothers cried and sang along and who'd blame them
Now you're grown, so grown, now I must say more than ever
Go toora loora toora loo rye aye
And we can sing just like our fathers
Come on Eileen, well I swear (what he means)
At this moment, you mean everything
With you in that dress my thoughts I confess
Verge on dirty
Ah come on Eileen
These people round here wear beaten down eyes
Sunk in smoke dried faces
They're so resigned to what their fate is
But not us, no not us
We are far too young and clever
Eileen I'll sing this tune forever
Come on Eileen well I swear (what he means)
Ah come on, let's take off everything
That pretty red dress Eileen (tell him yes)
Ah come on Eileen

Go on, sing those words. Surprising eh? And that page doesn't contain just the lyrics, many of the individual words are linked to other lyrics using the same words. Pretty cool, eh? I'm so glad that Caltech students have so much spare time on their hands. And I'm not being sarcastic.

See, that's what the internet is for!

2003-07-18T13:51:00.000+01:00

Wet hairy thoughts

A post by pixeldiva:

According to Lush (via the BBC) the best place to wash your hair is in Scotland.

Well no shit sherlock.

When I lived in Glasgow I never ever used conditioner, and my hair was always shiny and in good condition. Since moving down to London I find I have to use conditioner every time I wash my hair, otherwise I look like something that's been dragged through a hedge backwards.

Still, it looks like Lush have the right idea - regional shampoos, rather than just by hair type. Shiny clean hair for all!

reminded me of a conversation many years ago when I clumsily tried to explain to a group of English friends that my hair was much nicer when I washed it at my parents' home (in Wales). The water feels "wetter" (cue much hilarity), it absorbs into your skin and hair in a way that English hard water never does. In a very hard water area the water can almost bounce off your skin.

I'd never heard of limescale until I moved to England. I couldn't believe my eyes when I opened a kettle for the first time. 'Course now I know all about lovely water filters so it's rarely an issue.

So now it's official. And I still love washing my hair in Wales.

2003-07-18T12:45:00.000+01:00

Nice one

from British Dispatches

After numerous rounds of "We don't even know if Saddam is still alive", Saddam decided to send George W. Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know that he is still in the game. Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a coded message:

370HSSV-0773H

George W. couldn't figure it out so he typed it out and faxed it to Colin Powell.

Colin and his aides had no clue either so they sent it to the CIA. No one could solve it so it went to the NSA and then to MIT and NASA and the Secret Service ... the list got longer and longer.

Eventually they asked Mossad in Israel for help. Captain Moishe Pippick took one look at it and replied: "Tell the President he is looking at the message upside down."

2003-07-18T02:17:00.000+01:00

List of people you wish had a blog, part 1

This one doesn't really count because it was last updated in 1999 but it's my contribution to the new "It's Friday and time for a smile" theme...

2003-07-18T02:06:00.000+01:00

Tired of annoying pop-up ads?

Click here.
Sorry. Blame them.

2003-07-16T12:25:00.000+01:00

Talking about recipes...

This has to be one of the most strange but curiously appealing recipes I've seen in a while.

Onion Flavoured Banana Sandwiches

Before you go saying yuck, this is a real recipe, and I used to eat these. Take a pile of onions and chop them then set them aside to use in one of my other recipes. Then WITHOUT washing the board lay your bread on the board and butter it. Spread one half of the buttered bread with sliced banana. Sprinkle this with sugar, then put the top on the sandwich. When I was pregnant I used to order a sandwich just like this from the sandwich shop near where I worked. The first time I got one was obviously a mistake someone made, but I found it totally delicious, and from then on I used to order a banana sandwich with sugar, made on the board you chopped the onions on.

We're going shopping tonight, will let you know if I succumb to temptation.

2003-07-16T11:58:00.000+01:00

New blogger: Madeleine's Kitchen Challenge

I missed all but the last five minutes of the interview but here's Madeleine's Kitchen Challenge.

This is how I'm going to force myself out of the pasta-on-Monday, lamb-on-Tuesday routine. Every week I'm going to choose an ingredient and I'm going to cook every night incorporating that thing into my meal. I figure if I do this for a year I will have forced myself to cook 365, give or take, different dishes. You may well be thinking that this is a pretty average way to spice up your life. Well, all I can say is you've never experience the invigorating effect of putting sourcream on roast lamb with strawberries and capers and having it actually taste pretty damn good. It's a little natural high that gives you that extra little smile as you're bunking down for the night.

I think the programme will be available on BBC radio's wonderful "listen again" system in a while but the presenter promised "lots more on blogging in the future". Will keep you posted.

2003-07-16T11:52:00.000+01:00

Radio 5 NOW!

They're talking about blogging.

Thanks Dad.

2003-07-16T11:34:00.000+01:00

Out of the mouths of babes

What the American Flag Stands For

Charlotte Aldebron, 12, wrote this essay for a competition in her 6th grade English class. She attends Cunningham Middle School in Presque Isle, Maine.

Do go and read it. Many thanks to Faustus MD for the link.

2003-07-15T23:37:00.000+01:00

For Quickos

With grovelling apologies to Sheldon Harnick (lyrics) and Jerry Bock (music).

Hodel:
Well, somebody has to arrange the matches,
Young people can’t decide these things themselves.

Chava:
She might bring someone wonderful----

Hodel:
Someone interesting----

Chava:
And well off----

Hodel:
And important---

Quickos:
Or meeeeeee!---

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
Make me a match,
Find me a find,
catch me a catch
Matchmaker, Matchmaker
Look through your book,
And make me a perfect match

Chava:
Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
I’ll bring the veil,
You bring the groom,
Slender and pale.
Bring me a ring for I’m longing to be,
The envy of all I see.

Hodel:
For Papa,
Make him a scholar.

Chava:
For mama,
Make him rich as a king.

Daisy:
For me, well,
I wouldn’t holler
If he were as Belgian as anything.

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
Make me a match,
Find me a find,
Catch me a catch,
Night after night in the dark I’m alone
So find me match,
Of my own.

(spoken)

Tzeitel:
Since when are you in a match, Chava? I thought you had your eye on your blog.

(Daisy chuckles)

Tzeitel con’t:
And you have your eye on the Twat’s son.

Daisy:
Well, why not?
We have only one Twat and he has only one son.
Why shouldn’t I want the best?

Tzeitel:
Because you’re a girl from a poor family.
So whatever Yenta brings, you’ll take, right?
Of course right!

(throws scarf over her head, imitating Yenta)
(singing)

Hodel, oh Hodel,
Have I made a match for you!
He’s handsome, he’s young!
Alright, he’s 62.
But he’s a nice man, a good catch, true?
True.

I promise you’ll be happy,
And even if you’re not,
There’s more to life than that---
Don’t ask me what.

Chava, I found him.
Won’t you be a lucky bride!
He’s handsome, he’s tall,
That is from side to side.
But he’s a nice man, a good catch, right?
Right.

You heard he has a temper.
He’ll beat you every night,
But only when he’s sober,
So you’re alright.

Did you think you’d get a prince?
Well I do the best I can.
With no dowry, no money, no family background
Be glad you got a man!

Chava:
Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
You know that I’m
Still very young.
Please, take your time.

Hodel:
Up to this minute,
I misunderstood
That I could get stuck for good.

Chava and Hodel:
Dear Yenta,
See that he’s gentle
Remember,
You were also a bride.
It’s not that
I’m sentimental

Chava and Hodel and Tzeitel and Daisy:
It’s just that I’m terrified!

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
Plan me no plans
I’m in no rush
Maybe I’ve learned
Playing with matches
A girl can get burned
So,
Bring me no ring
Groom me no groom
Find me no find
Catch me no catch
Unless he’s a Quickos match!

2003-07-15T14:18:00.000+01:00

Quickos. A statement

Read this and then this.

To the tune of "Delilah" by Tom "Sex on Legs" Jones:

Quickos
I saw the light on the night that I passed by his website
I saw the flickering shadows of love on his face
He was my Quickos
As he deceived me I watched and went out of my mind
My, my, my, Mon Quickos
Why, why, why, Mijn Quickos
I could see that guy was no good for me
But I was lost like a slave that no girl could free
At break of day when that tramp drove away, I was waiting
I cross the street to his house and he opened the door
He stood there laughing
I felt the knife in my hand and he laughed no more
My, my, my Mon Quickos
Why, why, why Mijn Quickos
So before they come to break down the door
Forgive me My Quickos I just couldn't take any more

[insert trumpet solo here]

He stood there laughing
I felt the knife in my hand and he laughed no more
My, my, my, Mon Quickos
Why, why, why, Mijn Quickos
So before they come to break down the door
Forgive me My Quickos I just couldn't take any more
Forgive me My Quickos I just couldn't take any more

2003-07-14T23:04:00.000+01:00

An ode to Quickos

(To the tune of Grandad) (with apologies to all non UK visitors and anyone under the age of 40)...

Quickos, Quickos you're lovely
That's what we all think of you
Quickos, quickos you're lovely
That's what we all think of you
Quickos, quickos

2003-07-14T21:30:00.000+01:00

Blogging goes mainstream!

Tonight's Mastermind (BBC TV) included a question in the general knowledge section something along the lines of

John Humphrys: What is the common term for an online web log or journal?
Victim: Pass

I came into the room as the "passes" were being read out at the end of the round, at which point the contestant admitted he'd never heard of blogs.

While walking the dogs we discussed what topics we would pick if we ever went on Mastermind. For me - the life and works of Pieter de Hooch. For M it would have to be the Zulu wars. This does not mean that I know much about de Hooch, just that if I had to spend months studying something in order to try and answer 15 tough questions, I would rather it be something interesting. One contestant tonight chose the BBC Blackadder comedy as his specialist subject...

So if you were a contestant on Mastermind what would you choose as your specialist subject?

2003-07-12T23:58:00.000+01:00

Froggit

Thanks to Graeme for linking to the wonderful world of kawauso.

But my heart still belongs to Quickos...

UPDATE: Le p'tit Quickos has his own site!

::ChasingDaisy::

I've moved!

To the person searching this site for pictures of Fiona Bruce

We interrupt this programme to bring you the news that

Best laid plans...

Quick links from an insomniac

Quick links

Yeeeeee-ha!

Yeeeeee-ha!

What we're eating a lot of chez Daisy...

Pasta with crushed peas and tomatoes

Ingredients

Method

Essex earthquake

From the inbox

From the inbox

Thought for the day

Thought for the day

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

From daily to weekly...

From daily to weekly...

Popping in to say a quick howdy doo da

Popping in to say a quick howdy doo da

Canine flavour

Canine flavour

Ben Hammersley's best post ever

And finally

New toy alert

New toy, new toy!

Why Girls Are Wierd

Why Girls Are Wierd

Doonesbury on blogging

This one's

Permalinks

Permalinks

Wireless News (*sniff, sniff*)

Wireless News (*sniff, sniff*)

Bzzz, bzzz, buzzzzy bee

Bzzz, bzzz, buzzzzy bee

Nothing of note

Nothing of note

Google referral by typo

Google referral by typo

More diverting tactics

More diverting tactics

If you...

If you...

Out of the mouths...

Out of the mouths...

Newsflash

Newsflash

Spotlight update

Spotlight update

From the inbox

Stop animal slavery!

Silly Daisy

New! The Manly Special!

Holy spam!

Too hot for Horlicks

I think this little critter

Flummeling is also good for you

It was bound to happen

Mission statement

Shifting opinions

Warning

Film titles as links

Inspired

One quick link

All charges against John Leslie dropped

Trailer Trash Family back again!

Quick links

Bloogle Google searches

Ding!

Phact or Photoshop?

Afternoon tea

Wow

By jove, he's done it!

And again

One more little test...

Wireless News (sniff, sniff)

Wireless News (sniff, sniff)